“Say What??” – by CallMeKarrie

CallMeKarrie is BACK with another post!

When you are single and trying to mingle, there is never a dull moment.  While some “courting” practices (& I use that phrase very loosely because I’m not sure if most people still know what that is… it’s a lost art just like chivalry and lady-like sophistication but I digress) have become very common, every once in a while, I still encounter a guy that makes me say “did he really just say that?”

I haven’t been out on the scene much lately but I can always count on my friends for great material.  The story I’m about to tell you is so ridiculous, I couldn’t have made it up if I tried…

Last Wednesday, I helped one of my faves celebrate her birthday at Josephine’s.  I must admit, it usually takes wild horses to get me out of the house on a weeknight but I really am glad I decided to go not only because my friend was super surprised and we had a good time, but because I got to see the subject of this post with my own two eyes.  This particular clown (who henceforth shall be know as CB which is short for Clown Boy) had walked passed our table several times and near the end of the night finally got enough nerve to approach.  He walked over to my girl E and said “hey, don’t I know you?”  Very confident E replied “no, I don’t think you do” so CB replied “yes I do, I met you at Lux the other night.”  Knowing she hadn’t been to Lux or ever seen this dude a day in her life, E said “no, that def wasn’t me.”  At this point I decided to walk away because there is no sadder sight than a guy unsuccessfully trying to run game.

I walked slightly ahead of my friends as we exited Josephine’s and when I turned around I realized that CB was now rapping to my other friend J.  Not wanting to hear his tired game a second time, I got in my car and rode off.

A few days later, the girls and I gathered for happy hour.  After checking her messages, J exclaims “OMG, this guy is crazy!”  She was referring to none other than the infamous CB.  This is how J recalled the last few days of interactions with CB:

When we left the club, CB walked over to me and said “hey, don’t I know you?”  I told him no and he said that he met me the other night at the Wizards’ party at Lux (at this point I interject and said that this is the exact same line he pulled on E… now J knows that CB is even crazier than she thought).  I told him he had me mistaken and he replied “my man Gilbert Arenas introduced us, I would call him now but he’s busy.”  (Ha!  Boy, bye…)  The more I tell him he doesn’t know me, the more he keeps talking.  “I tried to get your attention when you first walked in Josephine’s.  I was out front in the Phantom.  I know you seen me, I was in a PHANTOM!… oh ok, you probably just don’t know what a Phantom is.”  (Oh no he didn’t!!!  lmao).

Anyways, because he mentioned buying a house, I gave CB my number (J’s a real estate agent) and got in my car.  From the time we left the club until a few hours later when I got up the next day, this fool called me five times!!!  (Sir, these are not business hours)  Of course I didn’t answer so the next day, this fool calls me from a different number.  Because I use my cell for business, I answered suspecting it may be a client but instead it’s CB pretending to be someone else.  (where they do that at???)  He’s like “hey J, this is ‘MIKE’… I just wanted to invite you to my birthday party.”  So, I ask this ‘MIKE’ knowing full well that it’s CB how he knows me and he says “I met you the other night at Park.”  (FAIL again J hasn’t been to Park lately)  I ask if he’s sure he didn’t meet me the other night at Josephine’s and this is his response:  “no, but I saw you there.  I wanted to come over and say hi but you were with that dude CB… naw, I don’t know CB like that but I hear he’s a cool dude.  If I had a sister, I would hook her up with him.  He got a Phantom.”

WTF & LOL!!!  Let’s suppose for a minute that CB is really friends with Gilbert Arenas and drives a Phantom (although I’m sure it’s all a fairy tale), is this what some guys consider game???  Mind you, I left out other details including his McMansion in Northern VA that he told my friend was off her radar, but I thought this was bad enough.  Smh.  Ok, I’m done.  I’ll let you be the judge.  Is this dude serious & did he really just say that???

They call me Karrie but I swear stories like this write themselves.  🙂

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But I Thought Guys Liked Girls Who Liked Sports…

Stop.  Do you smell that?  Inhale.  Take it all in.  Football season is in the air!!!

Football season is pretty much the only thing I look forward to this time of year.  Think about it.  Cooler weather (I’m a summer baby, no thanks), shorter days (I hate that it starts getting dark before I even get home from work), and back-to-school time (I’m out of school so all this means for me is increased traffic) are all things that I can gladly do without.  The only thing I fiend for this time of year is football…

Yes, I’m a chick.  Yes, I’m a football fan.  No, I’m not just a football player fan (& if you don’t know the diff, clearly you’re not following @lilduval on Twitter).  Conventional wisdom would have you believe that most guys would find this to be an attractive quality in a female, but my experiences have proved the opposite.  Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t claim to know everything about the game, but I can def hold my own.  And where I may lack in knowledge about the game, I more than make up for in my knowledge of the industry and the business.  Give me some credit, I did my master’s thesis on sports branding with the focus on black football players, so I think that would give me some “clout” among my male counterparts.  I used to write my own sports blog and I also ghost-blogged for a football player.  My male friends think its super cool, but guys I date seem to think otherwise.

I’ve had three diff guys express their displeasure in my affinity of sports, particularly football.  The first told me that it was just something he’d prefer to talk about with his “boys” and not with me (I think he didn’t respect my opinion because his team sucked & I reminded him every chance I got).  The second claimed that he thought that it wasn’t the sport that I liked, but the players (Now, don’t get me wrong, I’m  very hetero & love strong, muscular black men.  I don’t care what he’s doing, if he looks good I’m gonna notice.  I’m not as far gone as Lil Wayne wishing I could eff every dude in the world, but I have remixed Jay-Z “Girls Girls Girls” to my own “Boys Boys Boys” to show my appreciation, lol.).  I think guy #2 was secretly mad that I beat him in Madden.  The third guy said he enjoys teaching “his girl” about football.  This shouldn’t have been a problem but in trying to “teach” me something I already knew, he realized he wasn’t completely knowledgeable himself.

I know what you’re thinking and no I am not one of those emasculating females who likes to show a man how much I really don’t need him but I’m not the helpless damsel in distress either.  I am me, I like what I like, & I LIKE FOOTBALL!!!  And the likelihood of me putting up with a guy that can’t appreciate that about me, NEVERMORE! (ß if you didn’t get that, please go read a book, lol)

by  ~ CallMeKarrie