At what point does your interaction with a guy/girl make it unsafe to date his friend??  LoL, before you say “DON’T DO IT!“,  hear me out. . .

Just because he’s interested in me, does that mean I can’t prefer his friend?

This guy used to like me. We hung out  plenty of times. I didn’t want to hurt his feelings so I never really told him I wasn’t interested in him the same way he was interested in me. BUT one night… I slipped and let him stay over. He did me a “favor” which I did not return and afterwards I felt kinda bad about it. He hasn’t spent the night again since. He’s tried and I’ve shut it down. The whole situation mutually fizzed out. A while after, I found  myself attracted to one of his friends. BUT I knew it would’ve been wrong to act on it because of what transpired, even though Friend # 1 and I weren’t officially dating and we didn’t actually have sex. . . or kiss (on the mouth lol).

BUT again, my question is : At what point is the line of “off limits” drawn? Is it automatic as soon as one friend expresses interest in someone? OR is it crossing the line only if “sexual acts” occur? LoL

Annnnnd GO!



  1. My mind changes SO often, but now…right this second…I think you should go for it with the cutie (friend #2) IF (and only if) this is mutual interest and your advances will be reciprocated.
    Do you know what friend #1 has told #2? If they are close enough that he shared the details of that night, it could get sticky because when you approach #2 he may bring it up and if he’s not interested…then they both have ammo to call you crazy, untruthful things.
    I DON’T think you should have a pow-wow and see if it is okay. If #2 is interested, it is his job to break it to his friend. You’re not in the wrong. I could see if #1 was “boo”, but he wasn’t so its not too messy. He can’t state his claim on land that he doesn’t/never owned.
    I’m just saying: “…that was just some head and head don’t count, right?”


    miss young

    • I THINK I’m going to leave it alone. . . I don’t even know where to begin.
      I guess I’ll just never know if he’s interested!

  2. I don’t feel its off limits to date freinds, as long has there wasn’t anything sexual that happend while dating. Men have these ego issues and no man wants there friend to know how there woman is in bed. I don’t think its right but that’s just how things are. Then they may even consider you as a slut and might even want to pass u along to the homies or it could even stop the freinds from speaking. All these sitiuations aren’t worth the hassle or the drama .

  3. LMAO@ didn’t actually kiss on the mouth that’s kinda funny slim.

    But, honestly, if yall were never in a relationship or had sexual intercourse then I really don’t see the problem. People always put up these walls saying this and that is off limits (ownership of another). I understand how that would make you feel wierd but does the other person get a chance to decide if he/she wants to be put in that situation? Rhetorical Question folks. You have to communicate to both parties to see what they both think and how they both feel. He did somewhat share a night of passion with you so he might still have some feelings for you. Play it safe and just avoid the headache. Try someone else.

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